The road so far… why can’t I keep up with TV shows?

For the LIFE of me I do not understand why I am currently in my 5th hour of Chopped re-runs on The Food Network, yet I haven’t watched any of the final season of Da Vinci’s Demons. You know, that came out in October… OF LAST YEAR. I was practically begging STARZ to livestream the season straight into my brain, yet when it came out… nada.

The road so far... why can't I keep up with TV shows? www.verynerdycurly.com

What was keeping me from a mostly shirtless Tom Mison with long flowing locks and a smile that turned my legs into jelly? Why wasn’t I immediately bathing in the production values of this god damn pretty show? I dunno. Suddenly it seemed like too much effort to marathon it and make myself an emotionally available Hallmark card because it was the final season and I wasn’t ready? Maybe. Or maybe it was just easier to see which house a fiendishly annoying middle-class couple would choose on this episode of House Hunters, which I’m pretty sure I had already seen.

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When did I become such a passive viewer? I am the bane of the television world in that I never watch live and it takes me weeks… months… god even years to catch up on an episode or season that I let slip by. And I honestly don’t understand why.

I have a very addictive personality and part of me wonders if that’s why I try not to binge watch anything anymore (except apparently EVERYTHING on the Food Network and HGTV, I swear I’ve gained 10lbs just watching Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives). When I first started Game of Thrones I watched three seasons in a week. Like, I lived and breathed that show when I wasn’t in class or at work. I was left destitute after I’d finished because it would be a whole MONTH before Season 4 started. I managed to keep up with it, but I still haven’t seen Season 5 beyond the first two episodes. Why? Too much effort? I don’t actually want to be Khaleesi??

The same goes for Supernatural. I was determined to finish the ENTIRE SERIES SO FAR before San Diego Comic Con… two years ago. I was making pretty good progress. The first five seasons went down like a fine whisky (because they’re the best, let’s just be clear on that), but struggled through season 6 and I’m still stuck in season 7 purgatory two years later. Season 7… that really did get to be too much effort.

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I got so into those two series as I dived in, that I think I drowned a bit. It became too much and I had to step away. It just seems that I just kept stepping away… until I was about thirty miles away with car keys in my hand ready to drive to Tampa. But then it happened with new shows that I was really excited for. Remember all that stuff I wrote about The Librarians? The review, the lists, the interviews with the cast and crew? I was keyed in to that and the fandom from the get go, I could have had a great run with that content wise and I loved the premiere. It was everything I wanted in a television show.

But I still haven’t seen all of the first season.

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Yeah, and it’s myself. WHYYYYYY, KRISTINA?! WHYYYY?

I was afraid of getting sucked in I think. I was worried my excitement would switch ovre to it and leave everything else I was already excited about all the time. Maybe?

I was so excited for Peter Capaldi’s Doctor that I fell off the bed when he walked out during the announcement event. I wrote about him quite a few times, gushed about his work, and actively reassured people he’d be fantastic. I still haven’t seen ANY of the last season. Though honestly I think a lot, if not all of it, has to do with Clara and that I despised her and didn’t want to deal with her seesawing characterization and the fact it wasn’t Doctor Who anymore but Clara What.

The road so far... why can't I keep up with TV shows? verynerdycurly.com

There’s a few reasons for all of this apparently, and yet not really a common denominator. Do I just not care anymore? Are my fangirling days and anxiety waiting for the new episode to air over? Or am I just in a (very long) slump and things will pick up again?

If you were expecting this to end with some sort of philosophic claim about the human mind in an age of technology and having too many choices and thus diminishing our desire to become properly engaged with our media, I’m sorry to disappoint you. I’m sure that’s a think piece somewhere and it probably has a great deal of merit.

Meanwhile, if anyone has any tips for me, I’d love to hear them because people are being stupid on The Food Network.

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Boo! On Ghosts, Spirits, & Tom Hiddleston’s Ass

Tomorrow is Halloween, All Hallow’s Eve, the day where our world and whatever notion of the afterlife/Veil/Fade you believe or don’t believe in are the closest.

I’m spending Halloween in Gettysburg with a friend and fellow history buff. We’ll picnic on the battlegrounds, roam about the adorable and historically significant town, and then we’re going on a ghost hunt (followed by a midnight showing of Crimson Peak). A ghost hunt you say? Yup. We’ll be given paranormal equipment and everything apparently. When she first asked me my immediate reaction was “oh god I’m such a chicken.”

ghosthugI don’t do horror. The Shining has scarred me for over a decade. I scream at anything that jumps out at me. My sister use to have long hair and would stand outside my bedroom door as Samara from The Ring patiently until I opened it. Multiple times. I always fell for it. She’s probably still laughing at me. I scare easily. I made the mistake of watching the first season of Supernatural in the dark (it was freaking SCARY in the early days). I’ve watched ghost hunting shows… well parts of them, before having to change channels (either from being freaked out or laughing at the ridiculousness of it). The radio series I’m writing actually deals with ghost hunters, and I’m some sort of masochist because this involves a lot of me researching horrible hauntings and things, which just freak me out. Despite all this, the world of the “beyond” still intrigues me.

After having a rather enlightening discussion with this same friend about spirits, ghosts, and what we believed or didn’t, it got me thinking about what I actually thought about what happens to people (and animals) after passing on.

So I asked twitter and facebook if they believed in ghosts.

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As expected, the answers were pretty evenly split. Just as much people think the idea of the existence of ghosts is rubbish as many claimed to have had their own experiences with the supernatural.

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As for me? I’m one of those obnoxious people who isn’t quite sure. On one hand, I only believe in hard facts, things that science can prove. On the other hand, I’ve had more than one occasion where I’ve been unsure, that my gut is telling me something vastly different from my brain. I don’t know if I necessarily believe in spirits waltzing around with unfinished business, but I do think there can be remnants of someone left behind, especially in traumatic death. I’ve been places where suddenly everything would feel… different. The energy would change. I’m empathetic by nature, so I’m already sensitive to other people, so perhaps i’m sensitive to this sort of thing too. I don’t know, I can’t explain it, but I would feel something odd and just need to leave. And I know I’m not alone in this.

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I’m easily spooked. Just a few weeks ago I was puppy sitting and the two were going absolutely ape-shit barking at this one spot in this one room. They would not stop. They wouldn’t go in there either. The house made a lot of weird noises that night and I was so convinced there was something that I slept upstairs instead of in my bedroom down below. Was my mind playing tricks on me? Probably most definitely. Was I still weary of the fact something was roaming about the house? Yup. My overactive imagination has trumped my rationale on more than one occasion and my general cynical nature had beat myself up about it even more.

I’m also a very superstitious person. While a lot of this I believe stems from my panic and anxiety disorders (I will seriously fret over the most innocuous and ridiculous of things), I can’t deny that there is something more to it as well. I have rituals I go through every night to ask for protection of those I love. I don’t even know who I’m asking or what, but I can’t imagine not doing the ritual because then something horrible will happen. It just will. In this same vein, I’m a big believer in charms (called omamori): all of which I’ve gotten at Shinto shrines in Japan. Shintoism is big on ritual, and even all Shintoists don’t necessarily believe in the spirits/gods (kami), but believe in the power of ritual (offerings, prayer to wish good luck and get rid of bad luck) and “energy.” The same energy that many people spoke of possible believing in or understanding that certain places can have that weird energy left over after death.  I don’t claim to ascribe to Shintoism in any vein, but I find comfort in the rituals of scarring bad spirits away to make wishes, of fortunes, and of the charms they sell to believers and non-believers alike. I keep a charm warding against evil in my wallet and gave happiness charms to my mom and sister. My sister still has a safe driving charm she got five years ago and claims it’s helped her on more than one occasion. We all believe they work and really, as I suppose with any faith or superstition (or what-have-you), the personal belief is all that really matters.

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Omamori for sale.

So if you believe in ghosts, whether you have had your own experiences or not, that’s cool. If you think this and everything I’ve just said is batshit, cool beans. You’re allowed to think that.

So we’ll see what this ghost hunt brings. Perhaps it will be super hokey and we’ll spend the whole time laughing and shouting out into the dark if some poor Civil War soldier has anything to say. Or perhaps or ghostometer thingie will start beeping and I’ll run away screaming. The movie will probably scare me out of my mind because well, creepy ghost things. But at least, at the end of the night, I’ll get to see Tom Hiddleston’s ass, so that’s something.

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How about you? Do you believe in ghosts?

A very crazy Comic Con

Padalecki Dance OffYou know that any post that starts with a “Jared Padalecki dance off” is going to have a story. Also, the Moose can boogie.

We’ll get to the jiving Jared in a bit, but let’s start with something a little bigger: SDCC as a whole. Last year was my first expedition into the world of Line Con, of battling Hall H and roaming San Diego’s Gaslamp District with half a dozen Khaleesis and Deadpools. It’s an event that no one is prepared for. Ever. And sure, I’m a relative rookie, but every year SDCC gets bigger and this year was no exception at all. There’s 150,000 people converging on that convention center every day, weaving in out out of booths in the exhibitor’s hall, and grabbing at the free swag handed out by street teams (I am STILL bitter I didn’t get one of the Sharknado foam chainsaws). Despite all this and the fact you will inevitably be crushed against more people than you’ve touched in the last year alone, there is something magical about comic con. It’s unlike any other event in the world (though apparently  NYCC is catching up in numbers). It’s complete madness. Where else can you see a panel about The Simpsons (and visit a giant replica of Homer’s head) and then have a run through an American Ninja Warrior-esque obstacle course themed for the new Assassin’s Creed game? Continue reading A very crazy Comic Con